Posted by: betrueblog | June 13, 2009

This blog has moved and is now on my website

Please note that I have migrated this blog to my website. All future posts and comments, as well as the content already here, can be seen by going to  Please join the conversation there!

Posted by: betrueblog | May 31, 2009

Be True to Yourself – and others, too!

Today I saw a bumper sticker which said, “As a matter of fact, I AM the center of the universe.”   It led me to reflect on what I see as a disturbing trend – an emphasis on fulfilling one’s own desires, regardless of how others may be affected.  Unfortunately, “be true to yourself” is often misinterpreted to mean “do whatever you feel like doing and don’t worry about the consequences.”  

That’s not what I think being true to yourself is all about.  To me, it is acting in accord with your deeply held values and refusing to participate in actions which violate those principles.  It is being true to your authentic self, the self God created you to be, as opposed to the shallow false self that desires instant gratification, thinks only about what it wants, and doesn’t care if others are hurt in the process.

Because I define being true to yourself in that way, I do not see a conflict between being true to yourself and being true to others.  The two naturally occur together, because when you do what you know deep down is right, you treat others the way that you want to be treated.  When you share your true thoughts and feelings with someone, instead of what you think they want to hear, you build trust and a level of intimacy that cannot develop otherwise.  Even when what you have to say is hurtful to the other person, ultimately they are far better off knowing the truth than continuing to believe a lie.

What do you think?  Is it possible to be true to yourself and others in all situations, or do you sometimes have to choose between the two?  Please share your thoughts below.

Posted by: betrueblog | May 16, 2009

Why would anyone hire a life coach?

As life coaching continues to gain in popularity, people who don’t understand what it is and how it works are asking why anyone would hire a life coach. Frankly, after seeing some of the tweets (for the uninitiated, a “tweet” is a comment posted on Twitter) from people claiming to be life coaches, I can understand the skepticism! However, there are several good reasons why a person would hire a legitimate life coach. Here are some of them:

1. You are unhappy with some aspect of your life, and know that you need to make a change, but are afraid to take action. A life coach will help you face those fears and overcome them. Sometimes we all need a little encouragement to do what we know deep down must be done.

2. You have a specific goal in mind, but you can’t figure out how to get from where you are now to where you want to be. A life coach will help you create a concrete plan of action, break it up into small steps with specific deadlines for each, and monitor your progress as you implement the plan.

3. You are facing a major life change (divorce, death of a loved one, or loss of a job, for instance) and are having difficulty deciding what to do now. Sometimes when we are in the midst of a crisis, we get overwhelmed and are unable to think clearly and plan for the future. Friends and family members may try to help, but they cannot be objective and their own emotions may get in the way.  A life coach can provide honest feedback and a supportive environment in which you can discuss all of your options,  decide which one is best for you, and then act on your decision.

These are just a few of the many reasons why people hire life coaches.  If you have ever hired a life coach, please comment below and share your reasons for doing so and how you benefited from the experience.  If you are thinking about hiring a life coach, I would be happy to provide a free initial consultation; simply leave a comment here or go to and click on the “Contact” tab to request one.

Posted by: betrueblog | May 4, 2009

My cat is my life coach

Naturally, as a life coach, I am always looking for inspiration and role models.  I subscribe to numerous newsletters put out by other coaches, I read motivational books and listen to audio recordings, and I ask myself what I can learn from each life experience.

This morning, I realized I’ve been overlooking an obvious source of inspiration that was literally right under my nose – my cat, Makana.  Here are some of the life lessons Makana has taught me by her example:

1.  Ask for what you need in any relationship.  Humans often make the mistake of assuming that a loved one should know what they need and provide it without having to be asked.  Makana knows better.  Every morning, she follows me into the kitchen and meows incessantly until I feed her.  In fact, if I do not get up early enough to suit her wishes, sometimes she will hop on the bed and meow at me until I get up and follow her into the kitchen.  She does this regardless of whether or not there is still food remaining in the dish from the day before, and despite the fact that I have faithfully fed her every morning from day one.  How much healthier would human relationships be if we each communicated our needs to each other openly and honestly, and made sure we were heard?

2.  Make sure you get enough sleep.  Makana does not hesitate to take a nap when she is tired, regardless of the time of day or where she is at the time.  She sprawls out in places (next to the toilet) and positions (on her back, with her paws in the air) that seem strange to me, but she doesn’t care what I think.  She sleeps whenever and wherever she feels the need.  Granted, as humans we can’t always immediately go to sleep when we’re tired (very bad idea if you’re driving, for instance), but we can go to bed at a reasonable hour that allows us to get the eight hours of sleep most of us need instead of the five or six hours we figure will enable us to get by, and take naps when the opportunity arises (usually Sunday afternoons for me).

3.  Show your love and concern for others, regardless of their response.  Although most of us would probably agree in principle with the idea that we should treat others the way we want to be treated, in reality we often treat others the way they treat us.  This means that if someone is behaving badly, we do the same, and get into a shouting match or physical fight with them or refuse to speak to them at all.  We wait for them to admit the error of their ways and apologize to us before we will consider apologizing to them.  We justify our behavior by saying that they started it or we are just giving them a taste of their own medicine.  Makana knows better.  If I yell at her because she has just made a mess, or push her away from me when she wants to be affectionate, she doesn’t hold it against me.  Five minutes later she is back, purring and eager for me to pet her or let her sleep next to me.   I wish I could forgive as easily as she does.

Posted by: betrueblog | April 18, 2009

Dreams Can Come True at any Age!

Have you seen Susan Boyle’s amazing performance? Even Simon couldn’t find anything negative to say! Here’s the link to watch Susan living her dream: 

At age 47, Susan Boyle still had the courage and determination to show a skeptical live audience and the judges just how beautiful her voice is, and shatter stereotypes in the process. Good for her! I would guess we’ll be hearing a lot more of her, and that she is only beginning to live her dream.

What are your dreams? What is keeping you from making them come true? Go for it!!!

Posted by: betrueblog | April 13, 2009

Christ’s new life…and ours

Today millions of Christians, myself included, celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ and his victory over sin and death. Of course, you don’t have to look very far to see that sin and death are still very much a part of our world, but Christians believe that God’s power is greater than the power of sin and death, and that God loves each individual enough to take on human flesh and give his life for us. We believe that God ultimately triumphs, no matter what happens in this life.

God triumphs now, too, because God loves us unconditionally. We are accepted just as we are even as we are also encouraged to more fully use our gifts to make the world a better place and become all that we were meant to be.

Even if you do not believe that Jesus Christ is the Risen Lord or your personal Savior, you can still benefit from reading his teachings and following his example. He knew exactly what he was meant to do and remained faithful to that calling even when it meant being mocked and humiliated and dying a horrible death. He spoke words of hope and healing – and backed up those words with loving actions. He forgave those caught in wrongdoing even as he challenged them to sin no more. He taught that God loves us and we are to love our neighbors as ourselves.

Just imagine what life would be like if all of us lived by those principles every moment of our lives. We would all be true not only to ourselves, but also to each other and to God. What a wonderful world it would be!

Posted by: betrueblog | April 3, 2009

Taking time off from work to attend church

Yes, you read that headline correctly:  I’m taking two days (Maundy Thursday and Good Friday) off from work next week so I can attend church services.  My husband is doing the same.   That’s how important worship is to us.  We’d rather give up some income than give up going to church.

Who or what is most important in your life?  If you say that God is, but spend one hour a week in church and don’t give God a second thought the rest of the week, then you are kidding  yourself.  Claiming that your family is most important, but then missing your kid’s birthday party because you’re on a business trip, or playing golf with friends, also says something about your true priorities.

Actions speak louder than words.  Many of us have noble ideas and good intentions, but often end up taking the path of least resistance instead of standing up for what really matters to us.  If your actions do not reflect your true values, what can you do to change that?

Posted by: betrueblog | March 24, 2009

Best You Tube video ever

If you haven’t already seen it (actually, even if you have – it’s well worth watching again), click on the link below to watch an incredible video.

What an inspiration!  Here’s a guy born with no arms or legs who has already accomplished more at age 22 than many do in a lifetime.  He exemplifies my main message – that ANYONE can transform their life with a positive attitude, a plan, and the willingness to implement that plan and persist until you achieve your goals.

What are you doing to achieve your goals and make the world a better place?  Please reply and share your story.  For resources that may help you achieve your goals, visit my website,

Posted by: betrueblog | March 17, 2009

A job you love in 48 days?

Dan Miller’s best selling book and workbook, and the six week class based on it, claim that you can find (or create) a job you love in 48 Days.  Is that really possible?  He provides multiple examples of people who have successfully done so using his system, so apparently it is.

Actually, I know it is, because I’ve benefited from his system myself, so much so that I am now teaching the course to others.  If you live on Maui, please join my 48 Days to the Work You Love class, which will meet for six consecutive Sundays from 7 – 9 PM at Kihei Lutheran Church, 220 Moi Place, starting April 19th (the Sunday after Easter).  Visit my website,, for more details or to register for the class.   The cost is only $99, which includes the book, workbook, audio CDs, a DVD with summaries of each lesson, and more! 

If you do not live on Maui, or the class schedule doesn’t work for you, you can still benefit by purchasing the seminar participant kit and working through the materials on your own; my website has a 48 Days link on the left side of each page that will enable you to order any 48 Days products and have them shipped directly to your door. 

If you do order the 48 Days materials, or have used them in the past, please share your own experiences here.  I know they have made a huge difference in many lives and would love to hear how they have changed yours!

Posted by: betrueblog | March 8, 2009

It’s still a wonderful life

Well, I didn’t make the short list of applicants for the island caretaker job I blogged about last time.  I’m disappointed, because I would have really loved spending six months on Hamilton Island, but Maui is also a tropical island paradise and my life here is pretty good.  Actually, it’s a wonderful life!

Naturally, the year-round warm weather and being able to watch the whales play in the ocean on my way to work contribute to my enjoyment of life here, but far more important factors are Steve, who is the love of my life and my husband of nearly 18 years, and my church family at Kihei Lutheran Church.  I really don’t know how people cope with life’s challenges without a strong faith, and I’m so grateful for God’s presence in my life.  There is so much bad news these days, but the good news of God’s unconditional love and forgiveness gives me hope, and enables me to celebrate life even when times are tough.

Is your life wonderful?  If so, who or what makes it wonderful?  If not, what can you change to make your life better?

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